Adult Adventures in Ear Tubes

I could not help but laugh when the ENT suggested I get ear tubes for my recurring ear problems. A 45 year old woman getting what is commonly thought of as a kids procedure; yes, that about explains my life. However, since the tinnitus and deafness are competing for what is going to make me go insane, I gladly agreed to the procedure.

My 7 year old had hers done a few months prior so I thought I understood the procedure. Oh No. I was sorely mistaken. My daughter got the better end of this deal. When she had hers done they gave her nice relaxing drugs and put her to sleep. Adults do not get the same treatment.

Ear tubes in adults are a quick, in office procedure with local anesthetic. I am sure that works fine for most individuals. However, I am one of those people that are incredibly difficult to numb. When I tell you I need a very high dose to get numb I am not kidding. Max that stuff out or I will feel everything!

Sadly, I felt all of this. It was not the worse experience of my life but it certainly was not pleasant. Now, I had ruptured my ear drum earlier this summer. If I had not done that, this procedure would have freaked me out a lot more.

The procedure itself is very simple. A tiny slit in your inner ear and insert the tubes; which are teeny tiny. The popping, pressure and pain from it was not fun. It also hurt a lot more for the rest of the night than I had anticipated. Unexpected side effects were my sinus’ draining and my jaw hurting (probably from stress clenching).

Three days later I am glad I got the procedure but disappointed that I still have random to low level tinnitus. I had been hoping that it would be completely gone. We had performed hearing tests earlier in the year and I knew to expect a drop in my hearing; however, I am still adjusting to that. Although, I am grateful to not be completely deaf as I have spent a good part of this year due to my ear problems, especially in my right ear.

My hearing has always been better than my eyesight and something I have always highly relied upon. It is an adjustment to not have that sense be as strong as it was in my youth. As we age, we change and hopefully have the grace to adapt and accept the changes with grace.

The one good thing to come from this experience is that I better understand my partner’s difficulties. He is deaf in one ear and having experienced this for any length of time has been eye opening. I never understood how dramatic even a slight hearing loss was when in a room of conversation. It can be very confusing as the sounds sometimes all rush together and your mind tries to make sense of it all. Now, that is if you hear anything at all. At my worst people would be talking across the table and I didn’t know except for the fact I saw their mouths moving.

Adventures in living,

Irisa

Call of Cthulhu (one shot)

A dear friend of mine did her first GM with Call of Cthulhu. It was tons of fun and the first time I ever wanted my dice to roll low!

This is the second time I have played a one shot campaign with pre-made characters. Both elements add different characteristics to how I roll play; which I enjoyed.

Playing a random character that is different than something I would have rolled for myself was a wonderful experience for digging into my roll play abilities. My character was a Japanese-American, 21 year old female science student who does not believe in the occult and lives in the 1920’s.

This was fantastic for me to try and play this whole game from the viewpoint of someone who doesn’t believe that anything like this is possible. She kept looking for logical, scientific reasons to explain these events … not at all how I look at things.

I enjoyed the challenge of looking at this campaign world from a different viewpoint and attempting to interact with the immediate situation in a very logical, rational way.

Going into a one shot campaign really motivates me to wrap my head around this as quickly as possible and bring as much depth to this situation as I can. This is different from my normal approach where I have a lot of time to get to know the character and have their personality and backstory unfold as a campaign progresses.

We are definitely going to play this again, but with our own character creations. This should be a very interesting session!

As a new GM I was thrilled to be able to support my friend as she did her first campaign. It was a wonderful night and went very well!

May the Insanity Continue,

Irisa

Gaming Families

Last night was session zero for us to create characters for a new role playing game (RPG). Potluck dinner was cooked, children ran around the yard, friends chatted. Eventually, the children were brought inside and set up for an indoor dinner picnic. Food as warm as the laughter and smiles around the table graced us. Children’s giggles and pleads for more our musical accompaniment of the evening.

Slowly, the tables cleared and discussions of characters, concepts, and stories began to emerge. Meanwhile the children played, watched movies and bonded with each other. They wandered in and out to roll dice and hear our stories then deciding this was too slow a night moved on to their next adventure until exhaustion claimed them and sleepover ensued.

Meanwhile the adults plotted, planned and grasped at ideas as they began to understand the GameMaster’s (GM) vision and find a character concept they hope to breathe life into.

I love the vision, creation, storytelling, social skills, math skills, motor skills, reading that tabletop gaming and RPGs bring to our life. I have gamed since Dungeons and Dragons first came out. I love all sorts of games, as do my children.

They love it so much they we have kid game nights each week, just like the adults. Depending on their scope and focus of the day we either do an RPG like My Little Pony; Cards, or a variety of board games. Birthdays and holidays are excitement for board games. It is quality time that even their friends want to come over and share.

They are learning that games can be an adventure and time of sharing with those you care for. It can be a way to make a new friend and dream that anything is possible. I hope gaming is a bond that we always share and enjoy in our lives.

Blessings,

Irisa

Letting Go and Trusting Growth

Another school year has begun in Ohio. My eldest has begun third grade and my second child has begun kindergarten. Fortunately, both children are very excited to begin school. I am sad to have them out of the home and miss them terribly. Thankfully, my youngest is not yet school age so I am not completely child free during the days.

I am not someone who looks forward to them returning to school. Seven years ago, I retired to be a stay at home parent. Being with them has been a blessing and I am not ready for this phase of our lives to end.

We live in an amazing school district that works with the parents. This year I am looking to be more involved with the school as I have better opportunities to participate with the school and have the youngest cared for.

I have not had an opportunity to be a room parent or participate in the Parent-Teacher Organization. So this will be an interesting experience for mama; plus an opportunity to meet other adults in the area.

As much as I miss my children, they are growing, learning and having invaluable life experiences while they are away from us. They are becoming more dynamic, fascinating people each and every day. So, we shall continue on this journey together and see where it takes us.

Happy Schooling,

Irisa

parenting

schooldays

Origins 2019

Brick and Mortar has planned their separate routes to Origins 2019. Brick would load the wagon and caravan with comrades to our Amtgard meeting grounds. Mortar would load supplies along with Boulder, Pebbles, and BamBam in her wagon and set up their temporary homestead near the meeting grounds.

Upon arrival, Brick scooped up his offspring and allowed Mortar to settle in without BamBam destroying everything in site. The Vikings in training made their way to the meeting grounds. Mortar secured the encampment then decided to allow another persona to visit.

A short time later the Oracle of Delphi was ready to visit the meeting grounds. The purple detective was first to greet her that day. They spoke of her security investigations for the weekly meeting and the oracle has foreseen that this meeting would be blessed by the Gods in fellowship, frith, education, and the bonding of our small ones.

After greeting Brick, Brill, Feyraine and other comrades Mortar ensured that the Little Monsters Den was established for the meeting. Here the small ones found small shields, swords, dragon eggs to quest upon, and dice to roll with monster comrades.

The next day the five of us explored the den of imagination. This is a wonderous place to find comrades of dice, card, cosplay, and general fellowship. We found dice to sparkle the imagination, storytelling, meteor’s, assassins, trolls, magic, dungeons and much more. There was a man of great imagination that had munchkins playing Warhammer and munchkins who dressed in steampunk alongside blogs and smacking kittens.

Back on our meeting grounds there were travelers far and wide. I enjoyed meeting those from our kingdom at large as well as those from other kingdoms. Friendships and alliances began this week that will enjoy a lifetime of growth.

Amongst weaving friendship, a weaving skill of macrame has begun. Dragon eggs were quested for and battle skills enhanced. Many little monsters came upon us with their guardians. They enjoyed sharing tribal stories, practicing their swordplay and discussing other wide ranging creatures called Pokémon. Boulder, Pebbles, and BamBam began to forge alliances for their generation.

The meeting of Origins 2019 was a glorious time and we look forward to the next meeting.

Blessings,

Sassy Viking Mama and Family

Bravery through art

I sit down to write for the first time in months. Suddenly, all three kids need me right this second and now I cannot get my focus back. Hence the life of a writing mom.

The last few months have been very introspective. I have had a ton of time to think as I drive 8 hours between my house and my mother’s. Being away from my home and partner made this even more draining.

My focus has definitely narrowed on what is important. I am back to simplifying my life and strengthening the bonds that matter most to me. Hearth, home, family, and tribe are taking priority.

Reflection upon my relationship with my mother, father, and siblings has been heavy on my mind. The memories of being alone, not listened too, and unsupported have been difficult to sort thru.

In defense of my life at home I became the kid who was alone and tried to cultivate an image of a tough person. In reality I buried my soft sensitive nature underneath the “toughening up” my family told me to do. I smoked, cursed, and fought with the bullies. The worse of it was I projected judgement as I was expected to because when I spoke of being open minded and accepting I was punished.

However, in my private moments I wrote, read and dreamed of being free. I have done a lot of things that I am not proud of to be loved by my biological family. Eventually, I became my own person and embraced who I am regardless of my childhood teachings.

All the while I have used literature, writing, and art to find myself as well as a means of self expression. The next step is to be brave about my art and share it. I am sure it will be rocky as I find my public voice but I look forward to sharing thoughts, stories, and poems.

To the next phase of life, I welcome you.

Irisa aka Sassy Viking Mama

Cycle of Life, Death, and Grief

Lately my writing has been private. This is due to my mother dying on January 30th. I have had a lot to process as I travel between Ohio and Pennsylvania. The stress of losing a loved one, aiding three wildlings under 7 in their grief and understanding of death, managing an estate, cleaning out a house, and dealing with my personal cycle of grief.

One of the things that has made this most difficult is that she chose to not have a memorial service. The lack of a closing ritual and space to celebrate her life has been extraordinarily difficult for me. Now that I am done with the bulk of travel I am going to perform my own ceremony, but it will not be the same. I am used to the concept of an old-fashioned Irish wake where you get together and share stories, memories, food and drink.

For a variety of reasons I am estranged from the remainder of my biological family. Contact has gone very well, but obviously awkward for not having spoken for years. Plus without a history and foundation of trust and support I find it difficult to take assistance from them because I do not know if there is a hidden motive or if they are altruistic.

This reinforces the bonds I want to have with my children and for them to have with each other. It has also enabled me to reach out to other family members about connecting more frequently and consistently once I am done with this part of the travel.

This life cycle experience has also reinforced where my spiritual and devotional practice falls in my life; as well as my writing. Priorities always come to light when major life events occur. It is a good time to take stock and evaluate/re-evaluate what is and is not important.

I have asked for more help in the last few weeks than I have in a very long time. I will continue asking for help as well. Without this help, there is just no way I could keep up on managing two houses in two different states, plus keep family life as stable as possible.

Blessings,

Sassy Viking Mama